Hello , i am back and i am happier (:

Did loads of stupid things . Had over night pool with George and co . Spent awesome time with Rach and ben . Adding on , met Joel Balls :D Went out with Wenda , met my Sexyzx And Last night webcam with Samuel (: I am happier , i no longer cry to sleep (: Anyway Merry Christmas .

I made a wish (:

I guess

Last night , i made the toughest choice . Just a click changes everything . My heart still hurts , I have not seen you in a week , and spoken to you in 6 days . You said you need time because youre stress . Aint we suppose to work things out and not leaving anyone behind . Somehow i still love you , but i know even if we're back tgt , nothing will work out . Both are us are too stubborn to make changes . Even if changes are made , we'll be a step forward and three steps backwards . Till now , i still feel that i am still not good enough for you .

Hello stranger .

Dear you ;

I wonder how are you . we did not text for 3 days already . I missed you , but do you . Why did you have a sudden change of heart ? Was it my fault ? I know you wont read my blog . And also i guess , if you ever come across my blog , at least you know that i love you . I dont know what wrong have i done that ever upset you until you decided to ignore me . It breaks my heart really .. I'm sorry if i am not the best girlfriend , and also i may not be the prettiest girlfriend you can bring out . I may not be the skinniest girlfriend you had . But all i have , is a heart , who stays by you at your ugliest moment . I dont understand why we fight through every one's perception just to be together and now , we ended up in the most miserable way.. I am sorry that i am selfish , i'm sorry that i have trust problems , i'm sorry for every mistake made in this relationship. I tried very hard to be the most caring girlfriend i could be , i tried very hard to make you happy . All i could say is that i really do not know why we will end up like this now . Things change , we meet new people . Tomorrow will be our 49th month )': You did not tell me anything , but please , dont leave me hanging . Soon it'll be Christmas then End of year . My only wish would be that we could sort things out , be it good or bad . I really miss you . I enjoyed every happy time we had together ... i am not sure if you already left or still considering to stay .. I only want the best for both of us. I love you still i guess ..

From me .

I miss everything about us .
I dont know what changed , but i know time can build back everything .

I'll do anything so that we remain the same . I know you still love me ... )':

Words we could never find .

I hate this year , everything . I felt that every good thing that happened , fades away too fast . And whatever bad things that happened , just stays . Best friends , who i used to think they were true . But things change , change too fast that whenever i read whatever they gave me , i could literally end up in tears. I missed my lovelies , all 4 of them , Eve , nana , amanda and xj . In secondary school we were so close that no matter what fights we have , we will settle it . But now , it's so hard to talk to one another . Or the matter a fact , we never talk any more. Seriously tell me what does forever means , fornever would be a better word . We been through shit and all it takes for a heart to fall and everything is gone . What's with the promises , you said you will never let me fall , but when ever i fall , i am always there alone to pick myself back up . You made my 2010 the most memorable year.

Seriously , everything changes . No one remain the same ..

a few more days

19 more days to Christmas , 25 more days till the year end .

Not in much of a Christmas mood , because i have nothing to look forward too .
This year has been horrible for me . So much more heart breaks than usual . It seriously sucks . I want 2011 to be a better year . I want you to take me for real . I lost too much friends this year . I want a good Christmas , i wish this year end would be a great ending to cover up all the shit this year. 2010 , it's as good as dead.

Even though it's still early to make 2011 wishes , but i wish none of this shit i faced in 2010 , will not be repeated in 2011 .

Heartbreak

Met with my dearest rachel , ben , Babyboy , Murphy and john . ( :
School was usual , had lots of down .
It's the start of dec and it sucks so much already ):

I miss my bby already ):